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“Well, Obama’s not going to be tanning.”

March 29, 2010
  • The healthcare bill hates the Jersey Shore. The 10% tax hike means your tanning bed visits might get a leetle more expensive. “I almost think it’s a racist move, if you ask me. Well, Obama’s not going to be tanning.” Nice one, Jersey.
  • Suspect breaks into prison after high-speed police chase.
  • Who needs a stairway to heaven when you can walk right through the door?
  • Do you enjoy midgets singing and dancing? Acting out fairy tales? How about mock-performing Swan Lake? Awesome! This theme park is made for you“The show’s centerpiece, a farcical rendition of Swan Lake, sees performers both male and female dressed in pink tutus and pretending to be little swans.” Get me on a plane to China RIGHT THIS SECOND.

Little People's Kingdom

  • Now you can inhale your coffee. Video complete with a bouncy man in a purple suit and a snooty Frenchman.
  • A bar in NYC is setting its menu prices like the stock market. Wall Street douchbaggery welcome.
  • Shaoxing, China hates YOU.
  • Town named after a “Lord Focko.” Hilarity insues.
  • President Obama geeking out – with a Thundercats sword. Oh, apparently he’s also a huge Star Wars fan… so much so that he would buy a Star Wars pop-up book. No joke.
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